at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
