Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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