I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize