I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
