We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
The air was thick with penises
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
