they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
