Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
