# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
