Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
