puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
