this beer tastes like vomit already
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize
