Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize