we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
