I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
