so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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