whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Randomize
