Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
this will be a night to untag.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize