Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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