This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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