Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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