So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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