You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
