Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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