Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
he shaved USA in his pubs
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
