Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
