Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
