Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
