physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
there's paper in my vomit.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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