I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Nicole vs. Life
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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