pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
