so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
