the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
