i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
