i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
