gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Randomize
