My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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