That's intense
Please, let me fuck your mom
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
