dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
