another moral hangover. fuck.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
