If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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