is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
