We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So many bounce houses so little time
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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