Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I queefed so loud it echoed.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
well, you know. whores of a feather.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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