Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize