It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
