I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
