..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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