i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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