So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Randomize
