i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
