Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
